Former Marathoner t-shirt

Price: $24.95

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Are you one of the many people who are so out of shape that they can’t even run the point six (marathons are 26.6 miles) at speeds approaching what the winners run the whole race at? Then you my friend are part of the demographic I’m aiming to reach with these choice threads! Remember, each enduringly cool t-shirt we sell is a custom t-shirt made to order just for you.

I get tired driving twenty-six miles - forget running it; which is why I love my new “Virtual Marathon Runner” video game. Yeah, it’s the best! All you need to do is keep an eye on “your” vital signs and hydration levels while “you” run the grueling race. I keep it real by drinking and eating every-time the on screen vitals let me know it’s time for some water or an energy bar; of course I drink soda and eat chips or a bacon double cheeseburger while I play, not that hard core stuff…I‘m fuckin amped for the Triathlon version!

All of our Superlative designs are printed on Top Quality, 100% Cotton, Dreaded Thread brand t-shirts!